A long-form, heart-forward, science-informed conversation
There’s a moment people with PSSD often describe, a moment that doesn’t look dramatic on the outside, but feels life-altering on the inside. It’s quiet. Subtle. Almost eerie. A moment when they realize something once instinctive and alive in their body… simply isn’t there anymore.
They’ll say things like:
“My body used to respond. Now it doesn’t.”
“It feels like a switch flipped off and never flipped back.”
“I want to want , but I can’t feel the wanting.”
“I’m still me in my mind, but not in my body.”
Trying to explain this to anyone who hasn’t lived it is almost impossible.
You’re not describing pain or symptoms. You’re describing an absence. An invisible loss that sits in the most intimate parts of your identity.
And the world doesn’t have language for that kind of loss.
Not yet.
But that doesn’t mean it isn’t real.
PSSD is real.
The loss is real.
The grief is real.
And the silence around it is part of the harm.
🔥 The Myth We’re All Taught: “Sexuality Can Wait, Mental Health Comes First.”
This is the core lie at the center of so much suffering.
Mental health settings have pushed the belief that sexuality is optional. Disposable. A footnote. Something we can put “on hold” while the “real work” of stabilizing mood happens.
People are told, almost casually:
“Your mental health is more important.”
“You can live without desire.”
“It’s just a side effect , don’t worry.”
“It’s worth it if the medication helps your depression.”
But if you’ve ever lived inside a body with PSSD, you know instantly that this logic is broken.
Because sexuality is not a luxury.
It is part of your humanity.
It is identity.
It is bonding.
It is aliveness.
It is connection.
It is confidence.
It is mental health.
The idea that sexuality is optional is only ever believed by people who haven’t lost theirs.
🌱 For Young People, the Loss Is Not Just Painful, It’s Developmental
One of the most heartbreaking aspects of PSSD is how often it affects young people, teens, college students, young adults, people whose sexual identity, intimacy patterns, and relational confidence are just beginning to form.
Instead of discovering who they are, they find themselves saying:
“I’ve never actually felt desire in my adult life.”
“Everyone my age is exploring intimacy. I feel like a ghost.”
“Was my entire sexual development stolen?”
“I don’t know if I’m asexual or medicated.”
“I feel like I missed the doorway into adulthood.”
Sexuality is not something you “catch up on later.”
It unfolds as you grow.
It shapes identity, self-worth, relational skill, attachment, confidence, and emotional regulation.
When medication-induced dysfunction interrupts that, it becomes more than a side effect.
It becomes a stolen developmental stage — one that nobody warns young people about.
This is not a small thing.
This is not a footnote.
This is a fundamental human experience altered without informed consent.
💔 The Grief That Takes Hold, and the Loneliness of Experiencing It
The grief of PSSD is unlike anything else, because it is grief without permission.
People grieve silently because they think they “shouldn’t” feel so devastated. They tell themselves things like:
“I shouldn’t make this a big deal.”
“At least the medication helped my anxiety.”
“Other people have it worse.”
But grief doesn’t care about comparison.
Grief appears when something precious is lost, intimacy, sensation, desire, the ability to connect, the feeling of being fully alive in your body.
This grief is valid.
It deserves space.
And it rarely gets it.
But I want to say this clearly:
Your grief makes perfect sense.
Your fear makes sense.
Your anger makes sense.
Your longing makes sense.
It doesn’t mean you’re broken.
It means you’re human.
🌬️ The Nervous System Has Not Given Up, Even When It Feels Silent
People often tell me, “I feel like my nervous system went offline.”
But I need you to know something important:
Your nervous system hasn’t disappeared.
It hasn’t died.
It hasn’t forgotten who you are.
It is adapting.
Slowly. Awkwardly. Painfully at times.
But adaptation is still movement.
If the nervous system can adapt in the direction of numbness,
it has the capacity to adapt back in the direction of sensation.
Not instantly.
Not predictably.
Not linearly.
But biologically?
Absolutely possible.
And this is the truth that keeps me curious.
🔍 Where My Curiosity Lives: Possibility, Not Promises
I want to be very clear:
I am not claiming cures.
I am not claiming protocols.
I am not claiming certainty.
But I am deeply , fiercely, curious about pathways that support:
• neuroplasticity
• circulation
• nerve recovery
• reward system activation
• mitochondrial health
• endorphin pathways
• oxygenation
• hormonal balance
• emotional reconnection
Because I’ve watched bodies surprise people.
I’ve watched nervous systems wake up.
I’ve watched sensations return in small, hopeful waves.
Curiosity is not naïve.
Curiosity is neuroscience, it opens the door where hopelessness shuts it.
🌀 Why Endorphins Fascinate Me
Endorphins are your internal spark , warmth, connection, pleasure, reward, bonding. When the reward system feels muted, supporting endorphins becomes interesting.
Not as a cure ..
but as a nudge.
Because endorphins respond to:
• laughter
• connection
• novelty
• movement
• music
• safe sensuality
• warmth
• breath
I’ve seen people who felt nothing for months suddenly feel something .. a flicker, a shift, a spark .. during moments of emotional safety or novelty.
Tiny signals that the system is not gone.
Just quiet.
But capable of waking.
🌬️ Why Hyperbaric Oxygen (HBOT) Intrigues Me
HBOT supports:
• neuroplasticity
• oxygenation
• blood flow
• nerve repair
• mitochondrial resilience
• tissue healing
There’s no published research on HBOT for PSSD (yet), but when a condition involves nerve signaling, vascular function, and neurotransmitter imbalance, it becomes a fascinating “what if?”While we currently lack published trials of HBOT for PSSD, the treatment has demonstrated nerve-regenerative and sexual-function benefits in other contexts. For example, HBOT improved erectile function in men with vascular dysfunction (Hadanny et al., 2018) and accelerated nerve-repair after upper-extremity injuries (Ince et al., 2022). These findings suggest HBOT may support the kind of nerve-signaling, mitochondrial, and vascular pathways that likely underlie PSSD. The question is not whether HBOT could help , but when and how much, and for whom.
Not as a promise…
but as a possibility worth exploring.
🤍 Why Mind–Body Reconnection Matters More Than People Realize
Pleasure is not “in your head.”
It is in your body.
In your nervous system.
In your sensory pathways.
When those pathways have gone quiet, pushing or pressuring them often makes things worse.
But gentle, patient reconnection, slow breathwork, grounding, rhythmic movement, presence without performance, can help the system remember.
I’ve seen people find tiny sparks through slowness and safety.
Not through force.
That matters.
🌱 Hope Isn’t Delusion, It’s Biology
I have never seen hopelessness accelerate nervous system recovery.
But I have seen curiosity, compassion, and possibility open doors that once seemed sealed shut.
Recovery is not guaranteed.
But neither is stagnation.
The nervous system is built on change.
Built on adaptation.
Built on surprise.
And your body is not finished with you.
💛 You Are Not Hopeless, You Are Not Broken, and You Are Not Alone
What happened to you matters.
Your loss matters.
Your desire matters.
Your pleasure matters.
Your sexuality matters.
And you deserve care that honors that , not dismisses it.
Your story is not over.
Your nervous system is not frozen.
Your capacity for connection is still in you.
And I am here to walk with you through this, with compassion, science, and curiosity.
Call to Action
If you’re living with PSSD, longing to feel pleasure again, or feeling disconnected from your body, you don’t have to navigate this alone.
At Cardinal Point Wisconsin, I help people rebuild connection, regulate their nervous system, support brain health, explore oxygenation therapies, and gently reintroduce possibility back into their bodies and relationships.
Let’s explore what might help your system reconnect.
Schedule an appointment today — with no shame, no dismissal, and no minimizing of what you’ve lived through.
Medically Reviewed By
Teralyn Sell, PhD, LPC